Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Weekend Aftermath


Ha! Ha! A pun.

As you know, I had a lovely weekend with my grandson.  What I did not mention is how much he engaged in talking about Mike and how I was feeling.
He sure did take on some topics that most shy away from and it has left me feeling quite tender, but in a good way.  For me, the most poignant moment was when he said, "Well, Grandma, you could marry someone else."  I told him that I did not think that I ever would...to which he replied, "I guess that means that Mike was a really good husband for you."  He is so perceptively sweet and sensitive.

The tenderness that is not so good is the flare up of "tennis elbow" in my left arm.  I cannot even remember the last time I played tennis and I would have used my right arm anyway, so I don't really know where it came from.  I think it started on my long drive to Florida in October.  It seems to be going away and then returns.  Someone told me that quinine was good for such body aches so I got myself a bottle of tonic.  I think it would work much better if I had some gin to put in it though.

I have been wrapping Christmas presents, getting things ready for a trip to the post office and other deliveries.  I have not had to do this part before.  I have also not had to deal with the non-Christmas related expenses around this time of year--car insurance (I temporarily have three vehicles), property taxes for VT and two in Florida, Homeowners association fee, and then all the usual stuff.  No wonder Mike used to sigh heavily when he saw me coming in from a shopping trip loaded with packages.  I hope everyone will understand that I am scaling back this year!  I have cards, but I don't know that I will get very many of them out.  I am simply not going to worry about it.

27 comments:

  1. Changes that we decide are good for us. YOu many want to do them next year...OR NOT. I think you are wonderful how you move on ahead and find all the food stuff as you miss you husband. You have been the example I hope to emulate...if faced with such in my future.

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    1. We each have our own way of handling grief. I do hope that you do not have to find yours anytime soon.

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  2. Children have a way of cutting clear to the heart of the matter. He sounds like a real sweetheart! Your friends and family will understand that your scaling back is connected to your grieving heart. If they don't, then they weren't friends at all, were they.

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    1. One thing that I have learned from this is just how blessed I am with family and friends.

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  3. Do what your are comfortable with, everyone will understand!! That little guy is so perceptive, he's a gem!!!!

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    1. My heart will definitely break a little when he picks a school dance over a weekend at Grandma's.

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  4. What a cute kid, in more ways than one. You are very lucky to have him. As for gifts, I used to be lavish in the past, but this year, I plan to give everyone a can of macadamia nuts, which are supposed to be very good as anti-cancer and anti-heart disease. Not expensive if purchased at Costco.

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    1. Macadamia nuts are a wonderful gift and so Hawaii, too.

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  5. What a sweet boy! He obviously loves you very much.

    I agree with other comments that scaling back is not a bad idea. In the past few years I've stopped buying for as many or spending as much. My kids and I have gone to a small gift exchange...we'll buy each a few items but they are all low cost and generally useful and consumable items. I know I appreciate them more than getting some big gift that I park in a cupboard somewhere!

    Have a great week!

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    1. In actuality, I have been slowly scaling back for quite some time but I do enjoy gift giving. I usually enjoy the decorations, too. The hype and the messages to "BUY, BUY, BUY!" are just as well ignored though.

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  6. Ah, for the wisdom of children. And, mmmm, gigi, I like that idea of macadamia nuts!

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  7. Happy to learn you are just moving forward in all you now need to do. Small gifts are often the most treasured.

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    1. It's good to hear from you. I am hoping you are enjoying the Christmas season in your new home.

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  8. I enjoyed reading about your grandson's visit. I like it that kids ask direct questions and are honest about their feelings. And they are frequently more perceptive than we expect.
    I predict you will get everything done that you really want to do.

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    1. "that I really want to do..." Now that is the key, exactly.

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  9. Olga, I can understand how difficult this holiday must be... and scaling back is fine. We started scaling back a few years ago. We used to give everyone... family and friends... and the kids and grandkids always got beaucoup gifts from us. Then we went to 3 each... and now we only give the grandkids. Everyone still comes over for the gift exchange on Christmas and we either have Christmas brunch or dinner - depending, but only the grandkids get gifts.

    And your little grandson sounds like a gift in itself!

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    1. There have been times before in my life when I had to find a new way of doing the holidays. It's a bit raw right now, especially since Mike and I had already made some travel plans. I will figure it all out eventually.

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  10. Your grandson is just precious. I love the honesty and sensitivity that children bring to our lives.

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    1. I hope he does not lose that quality. Although both my son and my grand daughter have been labeled "too sensitive" over the years. I never thought that was such a bad thing, but it does make life prickly in some ways.

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  11. Week Aftermath. OK I confess it took me awhile to figure the pun. Your grandson is one talented young man. Often times when we need to hear something, the world has a way of providing a speaker. Listen carefully.

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    1. Yes, I am listening as much as I can these days. I want to demand that the universe explain itself.

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  12. Nice to spend time with the grands. It will be wonderful to hear the words they speak. The way they speak will make us forget our-self...

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    1. I do enjoy the time with the grand kids. Have to say i also enjoy the peace and quiet right after they leave--for a couple of hours, then I start to miss them again.

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  13. You take care, you wonderful gramma! You are loved.

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  14. Lucky you for having such a caring grandson who really is able to talk about sensitive topics. A lot of people will avoid talking about a loved ones passing, but I know it sometimes feels good to remember and talk about it. I'm glad you're thinking of being kind with yourself, Olga. You've already done so much.

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  15. Oh, the sweet wisdom of children! Get some arnica gel for your elbow (very good for bumps and bruises or overuse of muscles).

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I appreciate readers' comments so much. You don't even always have to agree with me.